4 Things about Youth Addiction
Written by Stephanie Praill, Intake Counselor at Portage Ontario. Published on October 29, 2020.
Canadians have become more open to talking about addiction and mental health, but there is still a substantial stigma that exists.
Common stereotypes include criminality, and “bad apples”. For a lot of parents, they may think that they’ve done something wrong and they put a lot of guilt on themselves when they find out that their child has been using substances.
Individuals who use substances are not criminals and your family isn’t bad.
It is a very unfortunate situation, but it is something that you can work through. It’s not something that every parent experiences, and it’s certainly not something that they teach you when you’re pregnant. You’re trying to navigate a complicated system, and you’re dealing with a situation that not everyone goes through.
I’m usually the first person a parent talks to when they are looking to access services through Portage. Sometimes parents are in a crisis because they just found out their child is using drugs, other times parents have been struggling to help their child for years, and are feeling hopeless.
I wanted to share with you four things that I think are important for everyone to know about youth addiction:
1.
Desire to change needs to come from within!
As much as you want to see your child or loved one change, the most effective way of supporting them is to help them get ready to make this change. Unfortunately, you can’t force change upon somebody, but you can definitely help them to see how they might benefit from change through conversation.
It’s okay to be honest and share how their lifestyle is impacting you - pulling on those heartstrings can be a helpful way to get someone ready to change. Knowing that it has an impact on someone else’s life may be enough for them to open their eyes that there is a problem.
2.
Importance of providing love and support
It’s so important to show love, care and concern. It allows the youth to understand that even if they make mistakes, they’re going to be loved. A lot of times, knowing that they will not be judged is enough. If somebody comes forward and tells you that they have a problem, that’s usually a huge step for them that took a lot of internal work to be able to just admit it.
Understand how long of a struggle it may have been, listening to what they say is showing love.
Give them a hug. Show that you’re there for them and that if they have problems, they can come to you and talk about it.
3.
Being open to having conversations
This looks different for every family, but the universal suggestion I can offer is to be willing to listen and discuss the “difficult” things.
Personally, I think family dinners are really important. The dinner table for my family was a safe space where we could admit things and talk about things that were challenging. There wouldn't be the same consequences as other places because it was our safe and open spot. Let your child know that it’s okay to talk to you about the things that are difficult.
Honesty is something that should always be celebrated.
4.
Having clear structure and boundaries
It’s important to have clear lines on what’s okay and what’s not and make it well known when those lines are crossed. Threats and boundaries are very different - boundaries require conversations and explanations as to why they are set in place and what the consequence will be if the line is crossed, boundaries are healthy.
If you’ve set the expectation that they’re not allowed to come home high and they do anyway, as hard as it might be, you should be enforcing the outlined consequence. Setting known consequences in advance and then following through on them is important for growth. If consequences are not experienced, the boundary becomes an idle “threat” which will not result in any changed behaviours.
Growth comes from reflection.
Having a support network is so important for recovery and that’s what we do at Portage.
We are a rehabilitation centre for youth between 14-18 years old. I am an Intake Counsellor, which means I am the first person that greets parents and children when they arrive here.
I love what I do because I get to see the change young adults make in their own lives. It’s inspiring because so many people wait until the middle of their lives to make a change, until they hit that rock bottom.
Knowing that these kids have decided to make this change so early in their lives, and that they have such a long life ahead of them makes me so proud.
Community Box: Addictions Edition
Our fifth Community Box was created in partnership with Portage Ontario, a drug rehabilitation centre for teenagers ages 14-18.
This Community Box includes a Crewneck Sweater designed by Tobias and Benjamin, two youth Creators overcoming drug addictions. The design is both meaningful and personal to their journey with addictions.